


Divided We Fall (In Love)

by starksnack



Series: Snapshot [3]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Feels, But not sleeping together, Couch Cuddles, Domestic, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Everyone Thinks They're Together, Foot Massage, Height Differences, Idiots in Love, Insomnia, Insomniac Tony Stark, M/M, Mother Hen Steve Rogers, Mutual Pining, Pining Steve Rogers, Pining Tony Stark, Pre-Slash, Separation Anxiety, Sleeping Together, Sleepy Cuddles, Stony - Freeform, The Avengers (2012) Compliant, Tony Stark Cuddles, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark-centric, Unhappy Ending, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-12
Updated: 2018-06-12
Packaged: 2019-05-21 11:51:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14914860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starksnack/pseuds/starksnack
Summary: Steve is hit with a ray that enhances all his desires.Wish Tony luck.(Just some angsty fluff)





	1. Cut in Half

**Author's Note:**

> My first longer fic on here. This one clocks in at around 7,000 words so I hope it's enough to satisfy you guys while I finish my super long one.  
> Special thanks to May (@marvelicious on here and @_stargxing on Insta), Nina (@el_gilliath on here) , Nat (@agentsofavengers on Insta) , and my wife Ava (@ohmyhiddles on here) for betaing this fic. I couldn't have finished this without their unending support, boundless enthusiasm, and sharp eyes.  
> This is totally spoiler free for everything because my ass is still stuck in 2012.  
> This fic can be read as a stand-alone but it does use elements from previous stories and the deeper plot line follows into some of the future fics I'm planning.  
> 

“We’re going to split you up to foster new relationships within the Avengers and promote better teamwork and efficiency.”

The entire team stared dumbfounded at the blank face of the director. It was clear to Tony, who had to take off his red-tinted sunglasses to glare at Nick, that the pirate had finally lost his mind if he thought the proposal was a good plan. He tucked the shades into the pocket of his new suit to avoid crushing them with the weight of his annoyance.

“With all due respect, sir,” Cap spoke firmly over the displeased murmurs of his teammates, “I do not think a team split would be in everyone’s best interest. We have just begun to grow comfortable around each other I don’t think it’s the best time to shake things up.” He crossed his broad arms over his chest, his chin tilted in strong defiance. The rest of the Avengers were quick in following suit and supporting him.

Tony was suspiciously quiet as he stood at Cap’s right, with his hands fisted tightly at his sides. Anyone who knew the billionaire could tell he was fuming. He honestly couldn’t imagine spending any length of time without his team. Without his best friend Steve. Over the last year all of them had grown close over their mutual desire to protect the population and their shared hatred for oppression. But with the team came other things and the brunet cared deeply about all of them. Tony couldn’t remember a time before Steve teasingly dragged him upstairs from his workshop for bedtime. A time before playfully sparring with Nat and Clint and inevitably losing when things got serious. A time before Bruce’s science babble to keep him from feeling lonely on particularly long bouts of insomnia. A time before daily team dinners and Tuesday movie nights, sharing the couch with Steve.

“There will be no arguments,” Fury responded, opening a file on his desk and looking it over. “The split will only last a week and we already have assignments for each separate team.” He read down the list, “Stark will lead Barton and Thor on a reconnaissance mission in California. You will be operating out of Stark’s Malibu mansion under the supervision of Agent Coulson.”

Tony cut him off stepping in front of Steve and fixing the director with a glare harsh enough to put him six feet under. “You are absolutely out of your damn mind if you think I am letting some Shield cronies into my mansion. The team comes as a package deal, you can’t just divide us up to suit your fancy.”

The brunet felt indignation swell up in him his fists tightening by his sides. The super soldier lay a gentle but firm hand on his shoulder pulling him away from Fury, after which the hand dropped to a steadying one on the small of his back in quiet support. He dug his fingers in, and rubbed out a slow, gentle circle at the bottom of his spine and Tony nearly let out an embarrassing mewl in the middle of the conference room as tension slowly leaked out of his shoulders.

“The rest of you will be conducting a search and recovery operation out of Stark Tower led by Captain Rogers and under the surveillance of Agent Carter the younger,” Fury continued as though Tony didn’t exist. “Sharon will be set up in the guest floor of the tower, I shouldn’t have to ask but please treat with the same respect as you would assistant director Hill. And if it isn’t too much to ask, please show Agent Carter the same friendship you do Agent Coulson.”

Maria Hill stepped forward to say something to Fury. Without a word or even a backwards glance the director immediately turned to exit the room through the side entrance leaving the team with Hill. “You are all dismissed. “ She waved her hands, her brow furrowed in stress, “The Quinjet will pick up Tony’s team in three hours be ready to go.”

Steve had to practically drag Tony out of the conference room before the hothead could run after Fury and throw down the gauntlet. When they were in the hall Tony whirled on him brown eyes darkened in barely contained rage. His shoulders were back to being strung with tension. “What the hell was that, Rogers?”

Steve flinched back at the bite in Tony’s words, his hands flying up in surrender. “I beg your pardon?”

“You’re our leader,” Tony snarled viciously, his hands flying up as he gesticulated wildly. He knew he was overreacting as always but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He went straight for the jugular in his anger, “so you’re just going to roll over and let them tear our team apart?” 

Tony caught the look of hurt that flashed across his best friend’s face but was too angry about the split to stop and apologize. If Steve was sad, it was his own damn fault for allowing the team to be divided between the coasts.

“Tony, look, there was nothing I could do,” Steve grabbed for his arms and Tony took a startled step out of the captain’s reach. 

“Some leader you are,” Tony murmured, turning and storming down the hall with no destination in mind. Shield agents scattered out of the way as he strode past the elevator banks without stopping. He had the suitcase armour with him so all he had to do was find a window and he could be at his mansion in under an hour. “Jarvis, plot a course for the west coast home,” Tony grumbled, as he flipped a latch and slid open a large bay window.

“Right away, sir,” Jarvis responded promptly, “With current wind speeds I have an ETA of forty-two minutes.” The route flashed against the screen of the helmet as it closed over his head. He could feel his glasses getting crushed against his chest but he couldn’t care less as the last pieces of the armour slotted together.

Tony scared a couple of agents as he jumped out of a seventh story window but he couldn’t care less as Jarvis engaged the thrusters rocketing him away from Steve in New York and towards his residency for what he’d decided to call hell week.

He would regret not saying bye to his best friend later but right now hot rage clouded his thoughts as he cleared the clouds and jetted past his tower and away from the island of Manhattan.

Anger burned in his chest as he thought of Steve allowing Fury to pull them away from each other even for a measly week. He couldn’t be the only one who valued his friendship with Steve over building new dynamics within the team. A dark thought crossed his mind and his heart sank in his chest. Maybe he was kidding himself and Steve didn’t think they were friends in the first place. Sure it was ridiculous but Tony couldn’t help the uncertainty creeping up on him as he passed over Pennsylvania.

It was going to be a long week.


	2. Ripped Apart at the Seams

Tony watched Finding Nemo play out on the screen in front of him with a frown stretched across his tired face. It was only their third day at the Malibu mansion and he wasn’t sure he’d last to the seventh. He was bored out of his mind and he’d left his favourite sweater, the red knit one Steve got him for Christmas, back at the tower. To top it all off his feet ached like hell and there wasn’t a blond with a grip of steel to massage out the sore muscles.

He hadn’t really realized how much he depended on his best friend until this god-awful week.

Tony wiggled his toes to try to ease the tension as he huffed at the tv screen. This was Steve’s favourite movie despite the lack of action and excitement. Well, he guessed the death of Marlin’s children could be considered traumatic to some but not anywhere near the mindless kind that Tony needed to keep him from falling asleep.

The couch wasn’t even all that comfortable. It was a squeaky leather that smelled of polish and cleaner. It sure as hell didn’t carry the scent of justice and freedom that the one he occupied at home did. The lack of the super soldier pillow made it all the more worse as Tony struggled to lean against the arm in a position that didn’t make his back scream out in protest.

Tony grinned as Nemo met Crush. This was Steve’s favourite part of the entire movie. In his mind’s eye Tony could picture the blond turning to him with a wide grin stretched across his face as he always did when they got to this scene. For some reason, Nemo hitching a ride with Crush reminded Steve of their first mission where he had jumped on Iron Man’s back and the genius had flown them to safety.

He guessed he could see the resemblance if he tried really hard. They had long since modified the way Tony carted Steve around during missions and battles into a more efficient hold that had a smaller chance of Steve falling off. Tony squinted at the screen as he swirled the last dregs of coffee in his mug. He missed the blue one Steve made him.

“Damn, I hate this movie,” Clint plopped down beside the engineer and Tony raised a brow at him. “Don’t give me that look,” the archer grumbled as he gently nudged Tony’s feet in towards his body, “unlike Steve, I’m not so whipped that I’ll massage your feet.”

Tony rolled his eyes fixing Clint with a glare, “Cap and I-”

“Are not totally head over heels in love with each other,” Clint finished with a smirk before fixing Tony with a raised eyebrow of his own. “Sure you’re not.”

“How was the field work today?” Tony asked in a desperate attempt to change the conversation.

If Clint noticed, he didn’t say anything as he pulled out his phone. He brought up a hologram of the blueprints he’d been able to pull from the warehouse AIM was using as their base.

It was cliche bad guy stuff. The organisation was basing their operations in a warehouse filed under the name of a dummy corporation. They were receiving funding through multiple donors using dirty money which was promptly laundered. It was scary easy to track most of the illegal transactions and pulling records off the web was child’s play to Tony.

It worried the genius and the archer. If Fury had sent them on this mission then it was a big deal. There was something the both of them were missing and the inconsistency sent matching chills down their spines. It was almost too easy for them to find the incriminating evidence they needed and that meant that there was something bigger going down.

“I feel like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop,” Clint whispered over the hologram as skilled fingers flipped through the images pulling out facial scans and matching identification.

Tony raised an eyebrow at him as he typed out orders to Jarvis from his own phone. He set it down beside Clint’s phone before tapping out a matching hologram and getting to work. “What do you mean?”

“Living with you guys and the team is amazing,” Clint shrugged as he slid a couple of documents to Tony’s screen for review. Tony matched points on the photo before running it through a Shield database while he waited for Clint to continue. “I’m just waiting for something bad to happen and take it all away from me.”

Tony surprised both of them when he set a comforting hand on Clint’s shoulder in silent support. “I get the feeling Barton.” Tony was still diligently working on the documents Clint passed on. “The best you can do is grab on to what you have with both hands and don’t let go.”

The blond nodded as he flipped through a couple more documents sending Tony the ones he couldn’t identify himself and the important interesting ones.

The genius surveyed everything with a careful gaze looking for inconsistencies. His eyes were starting to droop and he couldn’t imagine that anyone enjoyed paperwork, not even Steve who did paperwork for the both of them. (They’d long since given up on getting Tony to do his own and allowed him to just sign off on Steve’s.) He was just about to drop off when Jarvis pulled up a match on facial recognition. His eyes narrowed as he looked at the name associated with the face.

Rumiko Fujikawa.

Of course one of the people associated with the dirty business he was tracking was his ex girlfriend. He ran his hand down his face closing out of everything and standing up with an angry and impatient huff. It was too late to be dealing with this kind of crap.

He left Hawkeye sitting on the couch and staring after him as he headed to his bedroom to clear his thoughts. His fingers itched for two fingers of whisky but he fought down the urge. He’d gone without the vice for so long and Steve was such a motivating sponsor. He sat down hard on the edge of the neatly made sheets putting his head in his hands. 

“Jarvis, secure a line to the tower,” Tony scrubbed his hand down his face and rolled his shoulders back.

Steve’s smiling face appeared in the next heartbeat and warmth flooded his chest as the blond sunk his arms into sudsy water to scrub clean a plate.He was standing at the sink in the kitchen tidying up after what must have been a good team dinner. Steve spoke first leaning toward the hologram with a teasing smile. “Having fun shirking your responsibilities?”

Tony laughed as Steve quirked an eyebrow at him and rinsed off a fork. The brunet shook his head drawing his feet under him. “I would do anything, including chores, if it means getting a foot rub,” Tony whined uncomfortably wiggling his toes, “my feet are killing me.”

Concern crossed Steve’s face and he abandoned the dishes to lean closer and squint at Tony on screen. “You haven’t been sleeping well?”

Tony was captivated by the bright blue of his eyes and had to resist leaning forward toward him. He hesitated and a yawn giving him away as he grinned sheepishly at the mother-hen of the Avengers. Nothing ever escaped him, including the the dark bags bruised under Tony’s unfocused eyes. “Been busy with the mission,” Tony mumbled looking away from the screen and Steve’s inquisitive gaze.

“Get under the covers,” Steve was using his Captain America voice and the deep baritone sent a shiver rocketing down Tony’s spine. He hurried to comply slipping beneath the blanket and wiggling his toes against the silk sheets.

Jarvis blew up the projection and brought it closer to Tony’s face. “Aye aye Cap,” Tony murmured sleepily as another yawn took over his expression. He snuggled into the pillow imagining the warmth of Steve behind him, a privilege he didn't get often.

“Alright Tony now breathe deeply,” Steve whispered slowly bringing his voice down several pitches. There was the sound of splashing water. “Relax your shoulders and center your heart and soul.” He followed it up with heavy breathing.

That made Tony’s eyes snap open and he watched Steve leaning closer to the screen splashing water in the sink and letting out blasts of air through delicately parted lips. “Steve, what do you think you’re doing?”

“ASMR?” Steve leaned away from the projection drawing his hands away from the sink as a blush crept up his neck. He rubbed at his jaw sheepishly before shooting Tony a shy look from under his long eyelashes. “Isn’t that what the kids do these days?”

Tony laughed and Steve let out a couple of chuckles before joining him.

It wasn’t long before Tony was fast asleep.


	3. Safety Pinned Together

The notification came in at three in the morning on their fifth day at casa de la billionaire. Tony was anxiously sifting through all of the information Jarvis retrieved from the AIM and Hydra databases and cataloguing the important from the falsified.  Jarvis had taken the brunt of the work sorting through millions of pages of data and leaving Tony only the suspicious ones and the ones concerning Rumiko’s involvement with the whole operation. Even with the help of the AI it was slow going.

It was tedious work but not anything major so Tony took care of it from the comfort of his bedroom. It wasn’t like he had slept much in their time on the west coast. He had gotten a measly five hours after he had called Steve but the brunet hadn’t wanted to continue to disturb him every night. Back at the tower a normal sleep cycle was easy to keep. Steve usually forced him into bed and made sure he fell asleep. In the mornings he was coaxed out of bed by the blond for breakfast and a morning jog in an exchange for expensive coffee.

He flipped through the information taking a sip of a green smoothie that he was forced to make himself. He put in all the correct ingredients but he couldn’t manage to make it taste the way Dummy did. The drink wasn’t as sweet as he was accustomed. He was pretty sure the bot dumped coconut oil in it and the current smoothie he was drinking only confirmed that.

He drummed his fingers against the edge of the arc reactor as he set his drink down and zoomed in on a couple of files from several years ago. It seemed like the filing of multiple land purchases in Eastern Colorado. Nothing too big, just several properties. Tony traced several that were bought and then promptly sold multiple months later, just more money laundering, but one open lot hadn’t been sold.  He bookmarked the page sending a copy to Hill before flipping to the next page. Boring legal jargon. Tony cringed before having Jarvis scan it to pull out the important bits and translate to simple English.

He was halfway through the reading of a bankruptcy filing when Jarvis’ worried voice came out across the room speakers. “Captain Rogers has been hit with an unidentified ray and is currently unresponsive in the tower med bay.”

Tony was throwing off the sheets and pulling on a tank top before the AI could finish his sentence. He waved his hands to dismiss the files and shot Clint a text telling him to go through the rest. He would text Thor too except the man didn’t have a phone and had been MIA since the beginning of the week.  Tony didn’t even bother putting on shoes after he pulled on a loose pair of sweats. “Plot me a flight course to the tower asap,” he commanded as he exited the room with his suitcase armour in hand.

When Tony burst through the window of the tower med bay thirty six minutes later and he heard Bruce’s audible exhale of relief. He immediately shed the armour calling up Dummy to vacuum the glass that had sprayed across the floor with his entrance.

What he saw floored him. Steve and Natasha were lying in the hospital bed, neither of them looking injured. The super soldier was nearly crushing her beneath him as he murmured something into her neck.

Tony felt his heart sink in his chest as he looked away from the scene. He felt sick to his stomach at the sight of his best friend and childhood crush trying to bed someone else. It was just too much for his sleep-deprived brain to handle.

Natasha was the only one who startled when Tony flew in through the window. Her sigh almost matched Bruce’s as she squirmed under the blond. She got her hands firmly on his chest pushing him away from her. “Steve,” she huffed annoyed.

“You’re my best friend, Natasha,” he responded with a blinding smile, “you deserve all the hugs in the world.” He crushed her to him and she let out a squeak of protest.

Tony’s heart lurched. He thought  _ he  _ was Steve’s best friend. He fought back the jealousy as he picked up the suitcase armour and set it against the wall. On the bright side, if he was calling Natasha his best friend he wasn’t trying to bed her. 

“ _ Tony _ , boy is it good to see you,” Bruce called from where he was standing by the medical supplied. For some strange reason he put an emphasis on Tony’s name and the genius couldn’t for the life of him figure out why.

“Tony?” Steve’s head shot up and he immediately turned to look at the brunet in the doorway.

The smaller man didn’t have time to prepare himself for two hundred pounds of super soldier leaping at him with enough speed and excitement to knock him right over. The wind rushed right out of him as Steve nearly flattened him pressing a kiss against his temple and then to his cheek.

“It’s good to see you too, Steve,” Tony responded patting the blond on the back as he struggled to get up. “Let me up.”

Steve immediately stood to his feet taking Tony with him so he could wrap him in a bear hug. The shorter man found himself with his face mashed against Steve’s chest. He couldn’t help but settle into the blond and breathe in the sweet smell of home. The steady thump of Steve’s heart was a gentle comfort to Tony.

Tony looked up as Steve cupped his face slotting their mouths together. The super soldier tasted like the mint of his toothpaste and the ash of battle. His lips were slightly chapped and their teeth gently bumped together as Steve licked across his bottom lip. It was by far the best kiss of Tony’s life.

He gently pushed Steve away looking up at the man in confusion. He was pretty sure that when he left earlier in the week for Malibu they were at each other’s throats. He was also fairly certain that Steve didn’t think of him as anything more than a reluctant friend. He stood on the tips of his toes to look at Bruce over Steve’s broad shoulders. “That’s new, right.”

There was unguarded adoration in Cap’s blue eyes as he gazed down at Tony in the circle of his arms. He ran a careful thumb underneath the genius’s eyes frowning probably at the bags. “You look tired. Let’s go to bed.”

And before he could get in a word edgewise Steve had picked him up bridal style and headed to the elevator. Jarvis slid the doors open for him and Steve stepped in propping Tony against the wall and maneuvering a thigh between his legs.

“Woah,” Tony held back a groan as the super soldier rolled his hips against him. He had his lips latched on the smaller man’s neck sucking a hickey into the soft skin under his jaw. “At least buy me dinner first.”

“That can be arranged,” the elevator dinged and Steve carried Tony to the kitchen sitting him on the counter and pulling out a plate with freshly made steak and potatoes. “I’ve been cooking in here, I like it better.”

Steve insisted on feeding Tony pressing the fork against his lips until he slowly parted them and allowed the blond to slide the food inside. They continued on like that until the plate was empty and Steve threw Tony over his shoulders.

After almost a whole week of being away, Tony couldn’t wait to lie in his bed. Steve gently stripped him of his shirt and slid him beneath the sheets in his boxers. The blond then followed suit throwing off his own t-shirt and pants. He slid a small black sketchbook and ballpoint pen out of his jeans setting them on the wooden bedside table beside Tony’s glasses.

Tony’s jaw dropped when Steve crawled into bed after him drawing him into the circle of his broad arms. He felt the gentle press of Steve’s lips as the soldier dropped a kiss on his shoulder. Steve slid a hand up his chest laying a flat palm over the soft light of the arc reactor. It felt like a safeguard as Tony slid his hand on top of Steve’s slender fingers.

He slept soundly that night.


	4. Messily Stitched as One

Steve loved Finding Dory a million times more than Finding Nemo. Tony’s heart couldn’t help but melt every time Steve turned to him with an adorable grin when something exciting happened on screen.

Steve stretched across the couch his head propped up against the arm with a pillow supporting his back. He had a dorky smile on his face as he ran his finger down Tony’s spine.

Tony looked up at him from where he was lying on Steve’s chest. His legs were tangled with the blond’s and his cheek was mashed against Steve’s left pec. Tony wasn’t paying attention to the movie but to the steady thump of Steve’s heart. He couldn’t help but selfishly wish it beat just for him.

Tony reached down for the floor grabbing a fistful of popcorn from the bowl Steve had made and popping it into his mouth. The butter coated his fingers in a fine layer of grease and he licked it off enjoying the salty explosion across his taste buds.

Steve opened his mouth eyeing Tony hopefully so the genius reached down for some popcorn, a lot less than he had just shoveled in his own mouth. He used the tips of his fingers to push the kernels between Steve’s parted lips about to draw his hand away when the blond gently gripped his wrist. Within seconds Tony’s fingers were being sucked between Steve’s pink lips as he sought the butter and salt on them. He didn’t drop eye contact as he felt Steve’s tongue swirl between his fingertips and he had to suppress an obscene moan when Steve withdrew his fingers from his mouth with a wet pop.

Tony settled back against Steve’s chest hoping Steve wouldn’t notice his erection. With the way they were tangled together it was a pitiful wish. He felt the blond tense beneath him before grabbing handfuls of his ass and grinding their hips together.

No. Tony told himself as he fought against the urge to close his eyes and let Steve use him for his own pleasure. Their team was in the room, there was a kid’s movie playing in the background. He would not do this here, not with Steve incapable of making rational decisions. “No,” he whispered both to himself and Steve.

“Later then,” Steve responded letting go of his butt and sliding his hands up Tony’s spine to a respectable place high on his back. The other fingers drew lazy circles into his side as he refocused on the TV.

Steve ran one of his hands up Tony’s back his slender fingers curling into the short hair at the nape of his neck. The credits rolled but he made no move to get up as Steve dragged his fingertips across Tony’s scalp eliciting a near inaudible mewl. The other Avengers shot them knowing looks as they exited the common room leaving them in the near dark as Steve danced his fingers up Tony’s spine. 

Steve sat up setting his hands on Tony’s shoulders as he pushed him back into the couch. Tony tilted his chin up as Steve bent down to kiss him and tried not to shiver at the hint of teeth tugging at his lower lip. The kiss was short but needy. It was over before it even began but Steve was adamant on sitting back down in front of Tony.

Steve pulled the smaller man’s legs into his lap with a gentle smile on his face. “You said your feet were aching?”

“Yes,” Tony replied looking away as he admitted defeat. “I lowered the lifts in my suit but they still hurt like hell.”

“You don’t need any lifts in the suit.” Steve whispered as he dug his thumbs into the arches of Tony’s feet before dropping the right one to give his throbbing left foot attention. He rubbed Tony’s swollen bunion before going for his heel and massaging out the tension there. “I love how small you are, you’re the perfect height for me.”

Tony had to resist throwing his head back with a satisfied groan as Steve cupped his foot and gently rotated his ankle, slender fingers digging into the sore joint. Tony closed his eyes as Steve dropped one foot to pay attention to the next. He knew this Steve loved him and the tender care he was putting into his feet showed it.

Tony took a long sip from his mug, the blue one Steve made him. The coffee was already cold because Steve had brewed it for him hours ago, but it was coffee and Tony couldn’t bring himself to waste something so heavenly and made with love. His fingers ran over the beautiful lettering across the ceramic in Steve’s neat print. “You stop growing when you’re perfect.” It was hard to imagine that normal Steve saw him as that. As anything less than the damaged playboy he truly was. But with this Steve he could pretend that just for a moment he liked him back. That he made him this mug and gave him foot massages out of the tenderness of his own heart instead of guilt at his own perfection and duty to his friends.

Tony watched as Steve worked on his other calf pressing his fingers into the space on the inside of his leg where the muscle meets the bone. An ungodly moan escaped him as the delicate hands found the space behind his knees and Steve shot him a pleased look.

Tony allowed Steve to walk his hands all the way up to his inner thighs grabbing them before all his blood rushed south.

“Not today,” Tony whispered gripping the slender fingers in his calloused ones and trying to imagine Steve doing this of his own free will. With a sigh Tony stood, stretching and listening to the pop of his back. His legs felt brand new as he rounded the couch to head to the elevator.

“Where are you going?” Steve had the puppy dog look as he scrambled to get up from the couch and hurry after Tony. He hastened into the elevator his bare feet slapping against the marble floor in his rush to get in before the doors closed. “Please don’t leave me.”

Tony allowed himself to be pulled into strong arms and hoisted into the super soldier’s embrace. He was lifted up and forced to wrap his legs around the blond’s trim waist. He rested his head on Steve’s broad shoulder allowing himself to be carried to his bedroom. Steve lowered himself down on Tony’s bed leaning back until he had the smaller man laid on top of him.

“Steve?” Tony moved to sit up but the strong hands on his waist kept him pressed against Steve’s front. Slender fingers worked their way up his back splaying out across his spine.

Steve pressed a gentle kiss against the shell of Tony’s ear. “I love you, Tony,” he murmured softly before burying his nose in the tender curve of the brunet’s necks. “I love you so much it hurts.”

Tears sprung in the corners of Tony’s eyes and once they started he couldn’t stop. They dripped down his cheeks dampening the silk sheets and wetting the gold of Steve’s hair.

He had wanted so badly for so long to hear these words from Steve. From the hero he worshipped so fondly as a child. From the soldier he still reverently adored. But not like this. Not when Steve wasn’t in the right mind. Not when he didn’t truly mean it.

Steve almost immediately tensed beneath him rolling so Tony was under him and bracing himself on his hands so he wouldn’t crush him. He frowned blue eyes searching, “what’s wrong, Tony? What can I do to make it better?”

Tony sighed forcing a wobbly smile onto his face as the tears streamed relentlessly down his pinking cheeks, “absolutely nothing.”


	5. Torn Apart

“Hey, guys,” Bruce walked in as Steve was snuggling up to Tony over breakfast.

Tony would never admit it, but he absolutely adored sitting between Steve’s strong thighs with the reassuring weight of his broad chest behind him. He loved the steady thump of Steve’s heart against his back and his warm exhales against the back of his neck.

The team had gotten used to the two occupying each other’s space. Natasha no longer raised an eyebrow when the two got cuddly and Clint stopped cracking jokes after the first hour and started making gagging noises instead. Bruce continually shot Tony looks of pity. He was the only one who knew about the extent of Tony’s feelings for Steve having coaxed it out of him after a week of sleepless nights.

“Morning, Bruce.” Steve rumbled from behind him and Tony enjoyed the sensation of the vibrations across his back. He gently leaned back and Steve accommodated him tucking the smaller man’s head under his chin.

The scientist poured himself a mug of tea meeting Tony’s eyes over the lip as he took a long indulgent sip. When he set the mug down he rubbed his hands together. “I think I know how to solve your problem.”

Tony tried to hide his frown nodding as Steve slid his arms around his hips drawing him further into his lap. He gently gripped Steve’s hands on him never wanting to relinquish his hold.

He wanted so badly for Steve’s affection to be real. For Steve to love him this unconditionally. Romantically instead of just as a friend. Tony blinked up at the chandelier trying to keep hot indignant tears at bay as Bruce ushered them both to follow him downstairs.

In the medical bay Bruce found two sterile needles he swabbed Tony’s arm before sliding in the syringe and filling it with his blood. Then he loaded the dark liquid into the second needle and prodded it into Steve’s arm.

The moment he was injected with Tony’s blood Steve blinked a couple of times, disoriented as he glanced around the room uncertainly. He scratched at his arm unhappily but the skin was already closing over the miniscule wound.

Steve looked at him opening his mouth.

Tony was gone, off like a shot and heading to his bedroom to mourn the loss of the Steve who loved him. The Steve who gave out endless cuddles and foot massages. The Steve who kissed him because it pleased him. He knew he would never get that Steve again.

Later that night he visited Steve’s floor to give the soldier his sketchbooks back. “I’m sorry about this week,” Tony whispered his voice slightly hoarse from the salty tears. “I hope we can both just forget about it.”

Steve frowned as he looked down at the blue blankets fiddling with the edge of the sheet. He was lying in bed shirtless as he sketched the beginnings of a figure. The team had probably told him about how embarrassingly nauseatingly in love he was with Steve.

Steve looked like he wanted to say something but instead he nodded and Tony stalked to the elevator to head back to his own floor and wallow in his shortcomings. Maybe he could even catch a beer and forget about this whole mess with Steve.

Forget about the love he would never receive from the man he adored.


	6. Coming Back to Bleeding Edges

Steve has had a crazy week. It was coming back slowly in bits and pieces that made his head ache but he couldn’t help being happy that Tony returned his affections. For so long he had been pining after the genius. Natasha had asked him several times why he hadn’t just asked him out.

He was grateful for every little tidbit that flitted across the forefront of his mind warming his chest and reminding him of the closeness he and Tony had grown into over the course of the past couple days. It was like confirming his happiest thoughts. Tony, the arrogant narcissist who was really just a soft, broken hero, truly did love him too.

He hadn’t said it in so many words that past week but in the small actions he had indulged in. The messy kisses, the octopus cuddling, the falling asleep beside each other.

One of the memories that had come back was of him rutting against Tony in the elevator. It still sent shivers down Steve’s spine as he thought of the smaller man pliant against him as he ground up into his hard heat. Steve threw an arm over his face as he remembered the sweet ambrosia of Tony’s scent as he licked a nice bruise into Tony’s skin. A gentle but obvious claim of adoration.

Steve closed his eyes steadying his breathing as he worked to keep his blood from rushing south.

He wondered if now that he wasn’t under the influence of a ray or whatever he had been hit with, Tony would allow him to go further. If Tony was heading down right now to take Steve up to bed. To let him slide into the slick, wet heat of his-

“Captain Rogers,” Jarvis’ voice sounded over the speakers in Steve’s room and the blond sat up in his bed looking toward the ceiling as the AI spoke. “I have been asked to inform you that Mr. Stark is making his way to your room.”

Steve was glad that the sheets covered his naked lower half as Tony knocked and walked right in without waiting for a response. Steve could see the jut of Tony’s collarbone and held back a wide grin at the memory of the bone beneath his lips. There was a gentle roundness to Tony’s belly that Steve adored. Not quite abs, but close enough for Tony to be classified as fit but well fed. Steve felt the ghost of that skin under him and he had to drop his sketchbook into his lap.

Tony reverently placed the small pocket-sized Moleskine Steve had left in his room on the bedside table and dropped his chin to his chest. Steve could see the blush crawling up his neck. “I’m sorry about this week, I hope we can both just forget about it.”

The words were like a sharp stab to Steve’s heart as he watched the genius hurry out. His augmented hearing picked up the ding of the elevator as Tony left his floor and Steve allowed himself to lean back into the pillows.

He picked up one of the sketchbooks Tony had given back thumbing through the pages. A hint of Tony’s strong jaw, a flash of his warm whisky eyes. Every picture was a declaration of affection and reverent adoration of the subject.

A tear slipped down Steve’s cheek. This past week Tony had been nothing but so understanding and kind. He had never left Steve’s side. Given in to every forced kiss with a smile. He had refused to let Steve sleep with him while he wasn’t in full control. Kind and caring even when Steve was undignified and throwing himself at him. He was stupid to have mistaken Tony’s reluctant willingness and gentle kindness as a reciprocation of Steve’s feelings.

The pages were wet with Steve’s tears as he ran his finger down the circle of Tony’s eyes. Across the perfect bump of his nose and the bow of his delicate lips. The ink smeared beneath his touch staining his fingertips. The kisses he’d gotten from Tony this morning were probably the last he’d ever get.

Steve brushed away his tears with inky fingertips leaving lines of black across his cheeks like war paint. He looked down at his picture with a shaky smile before leaning down and pressing a longing kiss to the page.

**Author's Note:**

> Good luck!  
> 


End file.
